I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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