I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize