Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
