I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
