that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
