I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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