everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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