My brain says no but my pants say off.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
