I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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