Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize