Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
of course. lets lasso hookers.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize