I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
40s are totally the cure
Sorry about my life...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
