I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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