i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
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I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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