She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
