This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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