i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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