i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize