Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
