why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
