she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
