i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Small penises have feelings too.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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