When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize