we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
