White coat. Heels.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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