i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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