thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize