you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
