Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?

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  (770): Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich? http://tfl.nu/e2fw
  Replies (17) Good night (2188) Bad night (1122)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships

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  (201): it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships http://tfl.nu/cs10
  Replies (28) Good night (890) Bad night (4253)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.

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  (703): You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am. http://tfl.nu/rcus
  Replies (11) Good night (3885) Bad night (577)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.

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  (330): He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses. http://tfl.nu/vaq0
  Replies (16) Good night (4221) Bad night (1253)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS

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  (630): I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS http://tfl.nu/zymg
  Replies (7) Good night (2411) Bad night (661)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.

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  (706): Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence. http://tfl.nu/oul5
  Replies (0) Good night (1121) Bad night (508)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.

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  (757): and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion. http://tfl.nu/2944
  Replies (6) Good night (1321) Bad night (590)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.

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  (808): He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married. http://tfl.nu/414x
  Replies (18) Good night (981) Bad night (2373)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.

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  (715): At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves. http://tfl.nu/lin3
  Replies (3) Good night (413) Bad night (726)
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  (585): View more from New York

  I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.

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  (585): I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in. http://tfl.nu/1xha
  Replies (4) Good night (542) Bad night (540)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico

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  (651): Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico http://tfl.nu/a33d
  Replies (0) Good night (435) Bad night (302)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day

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  (813): Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day http://tfl.nu/x25b
  Replies (4) Good night (345) Bad night (724)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?

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  (318): i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option? http://tfl.nu/dgzq
  Replies (3) Good night (330) Bad night (556)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?

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  (403): I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought? http://tfl.nu/gptx
  Replies (1) Good night (426) Bad night (294)
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  (415): View more from California

  Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?

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  (415): Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do? http://tfl.nu/y25e
  Replies (4) Good night (216) Bad night (522)

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