They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
