youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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