Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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