I feel like abortions should bother me more
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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