another moral hangover. fuck.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
