how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
