Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize