he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Two words: blizzard sex
I want a musical about memes.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
