if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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