I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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