I want to stick my p in your. b.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
