remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize