What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
