I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
