one might say we're banned from that church
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
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