How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
