so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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