There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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