Have you finally orgasmed yet?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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