Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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