i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
My cat gives me a boner
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
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