I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Who did Billy Mays play for?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
