Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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